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ConSensual
ConSensual

Episode · 7 months ago

Apology Tacos

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Drama on set, a lingerie heist, and a game of taco roulette. It's enough for anyone to work up an appetite (in more ways than one).

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I am t minus thirty minutes away fromfilming a nearly naked scene for an international streaming service andI'll say it. I look hot, not just hot hot hot, even in this unflatteringfuorescent bathroom turned dressing room lighting, I'm awold by the versionof Cleo, I'm seeing in the Mirror: A strappy leathery Cleo in a lace, Garterbelt, holding up sheer black stockings and a thick coat of body makeup. That'shighlighting my curves in all the best ways, not to mention this black lacy braw,which fits me like a second skin, pushing my boobs up in a way thatnearly defies gravity, and now I'm humming wicked. Damn it! The point is I look good as sin, I havehalf a mind to send a thank you nowt to the Wardrobe Department, not just forthe costuming choice, but for the untouchable partial neds, I'm about totake in them piviting my hips. I lift one ass cheek up on to the sink and letportrait mode bless me and given that I have the dressing room to myself foronce, I even switch cheeks and get a few from the other side Hey. If you gotit Flan it and Lord knows: I've got it, especially today, as I swep through and star my favoriteshots for future use. The giddy feeling in my stomach turns into a tight,anxious knot, because these picks are hot and I so so want to send one todean. What would he do if he saw me in this? I can just imagine those gorgeouschestnet eyes widening if one of these bad boys popped up on his phone in themiddle of his work conference. Would he rush off to the bathroom andsend me a pick back or maybe just hit me with a bunch of droeling emoges. I swipe on do not disturb with a sighof defeat too bad 'll, never know. In fact, I probably won't ever see hisface again unless it's in a fucking Christmas card on my boss's fridge, the disappointing truth is that lastnight was perfect, too perfect, all the way up until well. It wasn't it's not even the whole sleeping withmy boss's, something that really bothers me. Well, I mean it bothers mein the same sense that it's totally inappropriate and should never be doneagain, but it doesn't sting nearly as much as what he said about my job just and anny. That's what he said likeraising his brother. Full time is just some bullshit minimum wage job, I'mworking to Fewon my stupid, acting fantasy. Well, guess what Mother Fucker? It'snot some stupid, acting fantasy, it's my reality and I have a job to do today,regardless of the near sighted opinions of some guy, even if he's a hat guy who's, a highkeysweetheart and a rock ar in the sack I mentally rewind to an old therapysession about compartimentalization. where, if memory serves me right, mytherapist compared my brain to a pancake, no a waffle. She said something aboutpouring different kinds of syrup into different sections, so it doesn't allrun together. That's what I have to do with my brain. Just focus on the workserup, not the Dean, zyrup except the Dean Syrup is running absolutelyeverywhere and that totally sounds like a jiz thing. Fuck, there's a triple knock on the doorwhich I've quickly memorized as hakems calling cart. So I snapp myself out ofit and tug on my zip up fleece. At least I can do him the decency ofputting my boobs away come in I'm faking, a smile that says Idefinitely wasn't just working through a miniature crisis. The door opensrevealing a grinning Hackea, accompanied by the unmistakable smellof Deli. Meat launch is out if you want to grab a bite before we get rolling. Just the mention of lunch turns theknot in my stomach into a rolling growl can have choreographd onscreen sex onan empty stomach. Now. Can I or maybe this whole lawful train of thought isjust getting to me either way I give how ceme a thumbs up and a thankfulsmile thanks, be out in a Seck Hakim smiles back before disappearing out ofthe door again, leaving me to dig my oversized sweats out of my bag,stepping into them as carefully as possible, so to not completely screw upmy body makeup once I'm sufficiently covered. I followmy nose up the stairs to the Craft Services Table where Evan isstockpiling all the good vegetables on to Hi tyrophome plate, leaving the restof us with a hefty pile of celery and...

...raw colli flower. How very on brand excuse me, I reached past him to grab a plate ofmy own perusing, the fruit tray before eventually opting for one of the miniroast bew sandwiches. Now my problem, if Evan has to make outwith my beef breath onset as I tear into one of the tiny packets of maynaisto dress this sucker up, I can feel Evans critical eyes boring into me. Am I in your way he eyes my sandwich as he picks thelunch meat off of his own tearing off a bite with his teeth, while tossing theHogi roll into the trash you're? So lucky you get to eat thatyou could too. You know there are plenty left. I nod toward the tray of sandwichesyeah. Well, he gestures up and down his torso gotto keep it tipe. You know how it is, or maybe you don't I don't know suddenly. My appetite is long gone andmy lungs feel like they're being filled up with concrete dude, what the fuck, what he blinks at me, totally innocent, as if he hadn't justabsolutely come for my throat. Why would you fucking say that I can hear myself getting worked up,but I can't help it and still he's staring at me clueess with the tiniesthint of reproach. What am I making a scene? Maybe I am alittle, but who could blame me before? I can completely snap Hakemreappears brushing crumbs off his jeans? Hey guys we're going to get rolling inthe gift shop soon you about ready his eyes, dart between the two of USEvan cool as a damn cucumber, if not a little confused and me on the verge ofcompletely breaking down that awful prickly feeling creeps up mythroat and into my sinuses. I am not going to cry on set. I am going to be professional. I have dealt with far worse bullshitthan this. Why am I getting so fucking emotionalabout one stupid comment? Yeah, just can you give me like two minutes got tomake a bathroom run. I shoot Ha Cime, a look that is just short of pleading. He must sense some things off, because,despite nervously glancing at his watch, he gives me the go ahead. Make A QUICKYEP! Thank you. I gulped down the lump bobbing in mythroat and power walk my way to the dressing room, snatching my phone frommy bag. Before locking myself into a stall. I won't regret the extra layerof privacy. If joy comes looking for me, I don't have to pee, but I shove mysweats off anyway, struggling to unhook the garter belt. That made me feel sosex you just ten minutes ago. Now it's just another thing holding meback the second. My Butt hits the toiletseat. The tears follow. I dropp my phone in my lap and free both hands,cupping them beneath my eyes to catch the gooy black maskareteers before theycan run down my face and ruin the makeup team's hard work: Fuck Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, Evan, fuck nonwaterproof, Masskar, a fuck feeling, so God damn lonely fuck. The fact thatafter all, the bull should have last night, all I want to do right now istext Bein mcdaniel, it's not like. I need some guys approval to know that mybody is hot and not something for duchbag actors to comment on, but rightnow I just don't want to be alone. You know what fuck it all. I'm textinghim anything to feel better right now I snatche my phone out of my lap andlet my thumbs work against my better judgment, firing off a text to thenumber I should have blocked last night. What are you doing tonight? He responds almost instantly nothing as of now. Why come over those three little bubbles pop up onthe screen then disappear. Then pop up again, I thought you were mad. I am moments later. My phone is buzzing inmy hand, he's calling me the balls on this guy. My thumb instinctually hoversover the ignored button, but I hesitate. I guess I reached out to him for areason. I Need Connection Comfort, a chaserafter the shot Evan just took at me, so I stuck back the snot swallow thetears and hit except...

...hello. Aren't you on set today, I'm embarrassed to admit it, but just hearing his low gritty voice,loosens the tightness in my chest. Why do you call me if you thought I wasunsaid, because I want to talk about last night.I chew at my lower lip what about last night? It was great until I fucked itall up. I'm sorry about what I said about yourjob. I was shitting I' not along with his apology, squashing down the pricklyfeeling threatening to climb up my throat again yeah it was. I was trying to reason myway into a reality where I could keep seeing you, but I shouldn't have said that shitabout your work. I know how much of a handful braid it can be and whateverI'm out there paying, you can't be enough they're lucky to have you yeah thanks and so is everyone working onthe show you're filming based on the Tunt. You pulled that first night inyour room, you're the best actress I've ever known, not that I know a lot of actresses but yeah yeah thanks the silence that follows is so long. I actually have to check and make surehe didn't hang up. He didn't, but I don't know what else to say. I'm grateful for the apology, but Idon't know where he envisioned this conversation going from there. He finally grumbles mercifully endingthe awkward silence anyway. Back to my initial question. Alright,you want tsat today yeah, but it's been a rough start, I'm just wegrouping by texting me. I can hear that smugsmile in his voice and my eyes roll on command. Don't let it go to your head. Are you coming over tonight or not he pauses again for a little bit too long, not exactly the enthusiasm I waslooking for. You sure you want to see some assholewho had everything handed to him from the day he was born. My stomach squeezes into a tight,anxious ball. I guess I said some brutal Shit lastnight too. Jesus look, I'm sorry. I know I'm sorry that was cruel. I get it.I've had it easier than you, but let's talk about it later. Okay,tonight, I'd love to see you again something about that last sentence putsa flutter in my chest where the anxiety was just moments ago, even after everything that went downlast night he'd love to see me. I kick my legs a little trying torelease this sudden wave of excited energy, a plan that backfires when theautomatic toilet, flushes thenate fuck- oh no, I almost forgot where I am sure deanhad the balls to call me, but I had the balls to answer it while in the damnbathroom was that a take you later by, I slam my thumb against the red button,ending the call and letting out a breath. I didn't realize I was holdingokay shit, not the most elegant sign off and I completely failed to naildown our plans for tonight, but at least the crying has stopped,meaning it's time to put all this personal bullshit behind me and focuson work, no more deans here up or Evans heare up just work, SYR up. Damn I should call my therapist and getclarification on that analogy. Pressing to my feet, I refasten theclipse of my garter belt rolling my shoulders back to summon the confidenceI know for Goddamn sure I still have miraculously minimal damage has beendone to my makeup and after dabbing up a goopy mask ora clump. With the sideof my thumb. I look mostly camer ready. At the very least I passed for someonewho wasn't just crying on the toilet and that's good enough to get to work at the mercy of whatever acting godsare watching over us. The shoot goes off without a hitch under closesupervision of the intimacy director. The whole thing feels more like apartner yoga routine than actual sex plus. We only have to stop to touch upmy body makeup three or four times I gues Tein was right about one thing.My job is kind of weird, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Fat, phobic,scene, partner, ind, all okay, that's a lie. I trade him outgiven the opportunity, but you know...

...what I mean once we're wrapped for the day I slipoff into the dressing room ready to pack up and catch newber back to thehotel, all that choreograph standing sax withmy leg, propped up on the counter of a gift shop. I'm ready to plop down onthose high thread, Count Hotel sheets, that's for sure, and if Dean and I canwork out our bullshit from last night, there might just be some makeup sex inmy not so distant future, hopefully lying down, though I'm donewith the Yogi ship for to day, as I dig into my bag for my streetclothes, I paused to catch one last, look in the mirror at this landret it'dbe a real shame to let my wet fart of a scene partner, be its only witness sure I have the photos and eventuallyanyone with a Webflix logand will be able to witness how slam and I look inthis get up, but maybe I can get a little bit more use out of it. Some Dean related use digging my phone out of my back. Ishoot Dina text done for the day, come by in thirty perfect just his quick reply is enoughfor me to make up my mind, I'm doing it I'm taking the Damn Langeret before Ican talk myself out of it. I pull my jeans and Slougy Black Tea on over thelaundrre tie my windbreaker tight around my waist and make a quick exiitout to my Uber I'll return it all tomorrow, passing it off as an accident.After a long day of filming worst case scenario, they'll hit me with a fine,whatever it'll be worth it, the goose bumps racing across my skinare sure of it. Hey guys, it's back a here fromconsensual, cockblocking, Oure, regular romance programming, with a quickmessage from our friends at early to bed, whether your booed up or totallysingle, I'm just saying you deserve a new vibrator any and every sex toilyou'd ever want. You can find it at early to bed quit giving Jeff Basosyour money and support this queer friendly woman owned Chicago based sackshop that has guaranteed the world better Saxons, two thousand and onethat' twenty years of Orgasms, with an extensive collection of curated toys tochoose from this feminise sax shop aims to be accessible to adults of allgenders orientations, experience, levels and relationship, statuses, yeahsisters are doing it for themselves, find them on instagram at early two bed.That's the number two and online at early to bedcom. Again, that's thenumber two fast discreet shipping check top notch customer service double checkfounded on the kind of feminist sex. positivity that we're all about. Do youeven have to ask all right all right? Let's get back to Cleo and deen catchyou later master raders traffic is a bitch. When I asked Deanto come to my hotel room in thirty minutes, I was estimating the usualfive minute drive from the visitors center back to the hotel five minutesin the Uber Twenty five minutes of buffer time to get my shit together.I'm golden right wrong. The three car pile up on the side of I ninety said:Fuck your timeline and thanks to all the looky Los Ogling the accident andslowing down the course of traffic. I have all of ten minutes remaining bythe time my uber drops me at the hotel. So no I'm not colden, I'm not evenbronze, I'm holding up the rear with Allof tenminutes to showers shave and get ready for well whatever it is dean- and I aredoing tonight, talk things out kiss and makeup fuck and forget that anythingwent wrong. The automatic toilet betrayed me before we could solidifyany plans, no matter what I'm doing my damust tomake sure the laundre heist wasn't for nothing. Once I'm back in good old room, thrtudred and sixty eight ice speed shower off my body makeup. Managing to salvage.Most of my eyeshadow then hit the laundre with eight generous sprits ofbody spray before slipping back into it, whatever it takes for me to not smell.Like I wore this literally all day, I'm set blessed be the Hollywood style mirrorin my bathroom, which is doing me all sorts of favors I'd be tempted to snapa few more booty shots if I weren't short on time, but I'm still manoeuvering my geansover my garter clips when two quick knocks echo through my hotel room, bethere in a seck, I doubled tap my phone screen to check the time Jesus he'searly. Couldn't he have been early last night instead with the final wonts over to be sure,every scrap of black laces hidden away. I hurried toward the door in fitted jeans and a soft looking bluebutton down. There's something about Dean's sthick tonight. That's doing itfor me sure he was sexy in a suit and adorablein Joggers, but this is my favorite...

...version of him by far casual enoughthat he definitely changed after the conference, but dressy enough to sayI'm trying a little extra hard for you tonight. Hey you, an irresistible half smilepulls at his lips, Hey yourself, my eyes, flicker awayfrom his down to the grease stained to take out bag. In his fist, what's that apology Tacos? He lifts thebag in front of him, allowing me a whiff of what has to be heaven in ahard shell, an olive branch. I guess inedible one at that. You didn't have to do that. No sooner are the words off my lipsthan my stomach chimes in with a rolling growl. I guess I never actually ate thatroasebe sandwich earlier. All I p his chest rumbles with a low, easy,laugh like gravel, tumbling down a playground slide. It pushes the hungerfrom my stomach to somewhere lower easy cleo one step at a time he tiltshis chin toward the bag sounds like HEU could use a bite. I was Goingta go with pizza, but Ifigured twice in a week was a bit much. You figured wrong, but I'm down forTacos to come in in. I stepped back from the doorway to let him insidegetting a hint of his colone as he passes. It's OAKY and unfamiliar. Definitelynot something he's worn the past few times. I've seen him TACO's and Kolone, I'm not mad. He hands over his peace, offering hislate colored eyes, scinning the room before locking with mine. Where are wesitting personally? I'm of the opinion that if I'm not the one doing laundry,there's no harm in getting crumbs in the bed, but it is then we settle in,on top of the Duvet keeping just enough space between us to spread out ourbuffet folding my legs. Underneath me, I rip open the bags unreaching theheavenly smell inside it's giving deans colone a real run forits money. I'll tell you that much. I flip the bag and empty the contentsbetween us. Six, tiny tinfoil, wrapped packages tumbling out. Each one islabelled with a totally allegible scribble of permanent marker there'schicken, Viggi and Karnia Sada. Before you can make a selection, I lay onehand on top of his knuckles an idea barely formed in my head. Wait let'splay Tako reulete, he squints at me, and I half expect him to swap my handaway from his, but he doesn't. He keeps it there hovering with minejust a few inches above a mild salsa packet. Excuse me without explaining. Igather up all the TACOS and toss them back in the paper bag, giving it asolid shake before holding it open in front of him. Pick one no peaking hisjaw ticks as his GAE bounces from me to the bag. Back to me, you're telling meI bought these tacos and I don't even get to choose the kind I want Yep withthe most overly saccrand smile I can manage. I give the bag a second moreaggressive, shake come on just pick one, it's fun, it'snot fun! It's unfair! You get what you get and you don't pitch a fit. He Haves defeated and soves one handinto the bed shaking his head as he feels around for his selection you'resuch a nanny you're. Such a macdaniel, now pick when already I'm starvingafter taking his sweet time feeling up every square inch of the bad he finallyemerges with two tinfoil packages. In one hand, a proud, smile breakingacross his face. This dumb ass really thinks you cheated the system Huh yourturn. He takes the bag from me and holds it out seconds later. I'm palmingnot one, not two, but three tacos. What can I say you can't want up me. We make quick work of our first tacosand he doesn't bother to try to talk to me while we eat, thank God, it's not until I've polished off TACOnumber two that I start to feel like a real human again damn I was starvingthanks again for bringing these I hadn't eaten since, like nine am hisface scrunches in disapproval, do they not feed you on set? They do, but todaywas weird. I don't want to get into the details, but my coastart is very you know. I gesture vaguely with TACO numberthree very. What how do I put this lately I take a hefty byte cupping my freehand beneath to catch any strayt Carnidas, then by myself, some time bychewing, as slowly as I can,...

...he reminds me of your friend Todd Dean,flynches Discustd, written all over his face mm, say no more yeah, not myfavorite person to act across from well. You must be really good at your job topull that off. I give him a tiny, tight, lipped smile. I am thank you and not tobe an Asshole, but I'm really good at my job too, it's myturn to flinch. I look up to check if I'm missing ajoke. Instead, I met with a look: That's not just serious. It's unnerving, I didn't mean to suggest you weren't.He squares his shoulders at me. His Gaze, unwavering you know. NEPPETISMdoesn't get you on a thirty under thirty list right. I roll my eyes onInstinct Duh. No really do you know that hiseyes narrow with enough skepticism, to make me actually question it. Do I know that I guess I just assume that the cushycorporate job came with the last name. I pick a piece of shredded cheese offthe DUVE and flick it into the paper bag. That may have been how I landed myfirst shitty sales job with Mac Daniel, but I was a different person back then somebody I didn't really like anymore, so I went and got an NBA and turn myself into somebody worthhiring the promotions leading the ECOinitiative. I worked my ass off to get to where Iam now sorry, I assumed coming from money madethings you know easy easier, don't get me wrong. Inever had to work odd jobs to make ends mean I came out of college with nodeath and a salary sweet enough to afford my own place in the East villagedifferent worlds, but that still doesn't make what I said. Okay, there's a long silence between us, butneither of US tries to fill it at least not until a promising idea. Pops intomy head, I lunched for the Brown paper bagdigging up the last tiny tinfoiled wrap package from the bottom and holding itout to him. In my palm. It's an apology. Taco a smile hovers around his lips, yeahyeah. I got the idea from this Cute Guy God. How am I already so Gooy and lamewith him? Luckily, he meets my dumb line with abig cheesy smile and a line of his own Hu I'd love to meet this guy sometimessounds like a real charmer. Oh, he is I feigned seriousness while allowing onehand to wander onto his thigh he'll charm, the pants right off of youmi think you may be charming the pants right off me right now. I'm damn welltrying if you're down, oh I'm dumb a wicked glimmer flashes through his eyes,but seconds later he tenses beneath my touch. What now should we talk about thenannying thing, my stomach plummets to my knee caps, shit yeah, that's a kink and not the funkind. Maybe we handle one thing at a time,I'm okay with it. If you are at least for tonight, I nod fortonight, we'll discuss it to morrowdoyou. One last question, though I bracedmyself for impact yeah who's, charming the pants off, whofirst a laugh bubbles out of me and before Ican respond, he closes the distance between us pulling me into him untilwe're tumbling back on to the bed in a frantic, desperate kiss the kind I'vecraved from him. Since the moment he walked through my door to night his hands find a steady grip on mywaist and, as promised, hardly a moment passes before he's popping open thebutton of my jeans. I Shim me to the end of the bed andlift my hips helping him ease the Denem down over my ass show time a spark of curiosity flashes throughhis eyes as he spots what I'm wearing underneath delicately. He drags his index fingeralong, my soft stomach, tracing the lace of the Garter Belt and leaving atrail of goose bumps in its wake. What'swhat's, this a surprise, a COIsmile tugs at my lips as he presses to...

...his feet and works. My jeans all theway down to my ankles unveiling all the Lacy Black Glory beneath. Just as I hoped, the look on his faceis absolutely priceless. His chestnut eyes widened glisteningwith some delicious combination of hunger and surprise. Oh Jesus Cleao. He slides his palms up my sthockingsslowly, like he's intent on admiring every square inch. Finally, his grip lands on the tops ofmy thighs, his gaze lifting to meet mine. Where did this come from? You haven'teven seen the whole thing yet with the promise of Moore. He reacheseagerly from my drapy black tea, and I lift my arms to help him ease it overmy head, revealing the matching leace Bra, underneath I'm totally exposed just like I was onset today, but this is different, intimate no choreography or careful adjusting ofclumsy hands, I'm not acting any more, and this isn'ta costume. It's me all of me dress to the nines for a man who makes me feelelectric and, judging by the drowsy look ofdesire in Dean's eyes, I'd say he's feeling the spark two whistling through his teeth. He stepsback to admire me head to tow and who could blame him. I know how hot I look and I'd say: Dean agrees based on theway his mouth is hanging slack his head. I slowly shaking and disbelief eachsecond. He spends taking me in sends another shot of pure confidence pulsingthrough my veins Ahbelievable Dean Cups, my Chin andleans in to press one gentle easy kiss against my lips good enough to eat. I lift a brow yeah, then, why don't you dig in sinking to his knees, his expertFingers Pri aside the scrap of lace between my thighs, all that stuff abouthim working hard to get what he wants. He wasn't kidding my moans Crescendo,as I feel myself inching closer and closer to my release. Qeing Dean toplunge two fingers inside me: crooking them just right to bring me over theedge with that. I'm a gonor coming undonefor him in record time when he resurfaces that same old smug,smile is proudly displayed across his face, but this time he's earned it a hundredtimes over. I fall back on to the bed and he joinsme. His fingers tracing a delicate patternalong the dimples of my thighs, as I slow my breaths down to a normal pace. He growls against my neck, giving mygarter belt a tug. U So I never got an answer to myquestion: Where did this come from? Vhil wardrobedepartment well played I smile back, but I'm allout of clever combacks. For the night, all my energy is being funnelled intopreventing my eyelids from closing three tacos and an orgasm, and suddenlyI'm ready for bed as good of an actor as I am I'm clearlynot doing a very good job, concealing it because moments later dean rolls onto his side, propping his head up in his hand and asks you sleepy. I grumblepawing halfheartedly at his zipper with a limp hand. Mcan, I charm the pantsoff you tomorrow. Is that an invite to spend the night Mi? Think? Yes, youthink. Yes or you know yes, I know. Yes, I sood up a little turningto meet his gaze. I want you to spend the night dean. Heruns his thumb along the curve of my cheek tracing a smile as it appears. Iwant that too. After slipping Dean, my spare room key, so he can run to hisroom for his night time stuff. I disappear into the Bathroom To pee andget ready for bed. I'm still congratulating myself on not fallingasleep. In my makeup, when I hear the door click again signaling his return by the time I reemerge he's alreadycleaning up the aftermath of the...

...apology, tacos in a threadworn Yankeeshirt and a pair of basketball shorts, I'm suddenly second guessing mythoughts on his prior outfit being my favourite so far, I think my final answer on my favoriteversion of Dean is the version that's sleeping in mybed to night your turn in the bathroom I run my fingers along the smale of hisback as I passed behind him. SAUNTERING toward the Med looks like we did pretty good in termsof crumbs Dean grins over his shoulder at me. We did pretty good in terms of lots ofthings tonight. Couldn't have said it better myself. Normally I'd prefer to wake up to acool dark room with any trace of the outside world, hidden by Light Blockingcurtains, but this morning is different. This morning the room is warm andcomfortable rays of sunlight are streaming through.The blinds and across my face, clio's head, is on my shoulder her armslung across my chest. The sheets lie in a twisted pile on herside of the bed. I can't tell what I'm more into the waythe curve of her body fits so perfectly into mine or how the morning lightbrings out the hints of Auburn in her hair. This woman does something to me she's turning me into a fucking poet. Itry to be as smooth and as silent as possible when stretching my free armover my head, but I must not be as slick as I think. CLEO's eyes stay closed, but hereyebrows furrow into a deep frown, and she rolls off my shoulder and on to herother side facing away from me. If you're going to wake me up at theasscrack of dawn, the least you can do is spoon me. She grumbles her voice, all gravel andinterrupted sleep. Not a morning person Huh, I roll on to my side and prope my headunder my elbow. The Silhouette of her hips against thesunlight, sends my thoughts right back to last night and a familiar feelingtwist behind my gut. Something tells me it's more thanMorningwood m only sociopaths are morning. People and I'd like you to spoon me, but you don't do it soon, I'll be dead tothe world in two minutes. It's this kind of gentle negging that slowlydriving me crazy, like she sees right through all thatMacho Bullshit and cut straight to what she wants. She's got maxy and she's really reallysexy. I just wanted to get a good look at you.First, I slit my arm around her waist and pullher body into me. She moves her ass into my hips, allright, definitely more than Morningwood. She lets out a satisfied chuckle what happened to being dead to theworld in two minutes. My fingertips trail the hem of her silksleep shorts. How about I charm those basketball,shorts off you? First, don't you have work today? She shakes her head. I'vegot the morning off, which leaves me Foreou to pick up where we left offlast night. Unless you have to hurry back to the conference, I grunt into a mental scan of theschedule. Nothing comes to mind, which means there's nothing left for me toget out of this thing, which means I'm free to happily miss the rest of theconference and stay in bed with Cleo all day M. I think I've got more pressingmatters at hand right here. She grinds her ass into me again withpurpose this time and my cock strains against the thin layers of fabricbetween us. I led out a low hiss. The Ache twingingdeeper in my gut last night was good, but I didn'trealize I'd woken up hungry until now. My Lips trail along the side of herneck from her shoulder to the space between her ear lobe and her cheek. She guides my hand under her top, whereI make small teasing circles around her nipple until she's moaning, my name she shimmyes out of her shorts, and Ikick mine down to the corner of the bed. Our mouths meet for the first timesince last night and any grogginess from before is gone where all urgency and limbs intertwinedand heat of the moment like this is the opening we've been waiting for. We've. Finally, been honest: It's allout there now and it's okay, we're still here together, Gonam,...

...we come up for air and I look to mysmall pile on the far side of the room where I know I stashed a rubber thenight before when I turn back to Cleo. She's beat meto it reaching into her bag by the bedside table without fully untanglingherself from my limbs show off I plant my mouth below hercollar bone. She giggles and pushes her free hand through my hair, beforepulling my face up to hers within moments the condoms on and I'minside, her CLEO's knees on either side of my hips. I thrust into her slowly and she moansher fingers splayed on my chest that same feeling from earlier is stillthere even more now like there's nothing left standing between us like for the first time, I'm reallyseeing her and connecting with who she is. And if I'm honest, I really likewhat I see. I take a handful of her ass and pullher hips down into me. She gasps and throws her head back,placing her hands on my thighs for support, Hoy Shit, Dean, music to my ears. I thrust deeper swirling, my thumb overher clit as low moans escaped from her throat. It isn't until she shudders andcollapses on top of me that I let myself go and were reduced to a sweatybreathless heap in the middle of the bed when we finally catch our breath. CleRolls on to her side and props her head up on her elbow well good morning to you. I laugh and swing my legs over the sideof the bed to take care of the condom. Ah, I'm hungry are you hungry, starvingroom service? I know a guy who can seriously hook it up. I think he knows the owner. Guess I'mnot the only one who hasn't forgotten. We have things to discuss, ha ha or we could go out. DowntownBuffalo has a killer, diner scene, her eyebrows shoot up to her hair line.Aren't breakfast dates for like actual committed relationships, no they'recriminally underrated. Look I've seen how the sausage getsmade in this joint literally trust. Me It'll be nice to get out ofthis fortress for a bit. She lays her head back on the pillowand presses her lips together in thought. After a few beats her eyes snap over tomine with suspicion, fine, but there better be Hash browns.I shoot her an incredulous look. Of course there will be Hash, browns meet me and the lobby and ten I grabb my stuff and head for the door,but not before planting a firm kissed to Cleo's damp forehead and earning anadorable snicker. Ten minutes later, I'm standing in thelobby in jeans and a button down just nice enough to play it off. If I runinto anyone from work. Luckily, Cleo arrives shortly after Ido in jeans and a tied up t shirt hair piled on top of her head and a Bun. I Call U Senouber and the two of UShead into town. We pull up in front of a small diner bythe water with a bright blue door. A few older couples wait in line at theentrance and make small talk with each other tourists and regulars alike. We join the line after I asked thehostess how long the wait is. The two of US agreeing that ten minutes isbarely await at all. The Sun beats down on us now and Iwatch as Cleo pulls off her jacket and ties it in a knot around her waist. I wouldn't think anything of it if shewasn't fussing with it. Why do you do that? Do what she looks up at me, eyebrows, knittingtogether in confusion. I nawed down to the pink knot capturedbetween her fingers, tie your jacket around your waist. Shetightens it with a shrug, it's warmout and I don't need it. Iguess I was wondering if it was like. I don't know a fashion choice. Is thiswhere you tell me your opinion of my fashion choices? No, no! It only don't take this a wrong way, but itreminds me of a mom at the zoo what the Fuck Cleo squintzs at me like she's,starting to wonder. If I have a brain, a look, I'm sure Brady gets all thetime. I'd like to think the seven year old warrants it more than I do. You know when mom's take their kids tothe zoo and they tire sweatshirt around their wayst, so they don't have tocarry it. It makes me think of that I don't think that's specific to Zo MOMS,but all right, she leans to the side watching as oneof the couples in front of us are invited inside there's a silence that has me wonderingif I hid a nerve,...

...wouldn't be the first time I saidsomething insensitive to Cleo, I'm constructing my apology in my headwhen she huffs a sigh and continues. I actually think I picked it up from mymom. She used to do it all the time with her cardigans draws the eye to the natural was I started that whole flannel around thewast trend from two thousand and sixteen I swear. I have the fourthgrade class picture to prove it. You did that in fourth grade yeah. Are you going to make me defend my nineyear old style choices? To fourth graders, don't have naturalwastes, Cleo, try telling Debbie that she was all over that bullshit low carbdiets and magazine articles about how to look slimmer by using belts andcolor blocking or whatever shitty trend. She dragged me to my first weightwatchers meeting when I was like twelve tried to make it a fun mother daughterthing. I would have much perferred as doo mom to a wheit watcher's mom. There's a labored beat where I struggleto find the right words Cleos the type to brush off childhood Trama as a joke,but that doesn't mean I should treat it with. The same levity also doesn't mean I should straight updoctor Pildas Shid and ruin an otherwise low stress morning. I try to craft my words as carefully asI can, without sounding too much like I'm doing my best, thanks for sharing that I, like learning more stuff about you,even the ugly stuff, a stern scowl forms on Cleo's lips asshe folds her arms over her chest. I'm sorry, are you calling me ugly? No,that's not a before. I can explain my word choiceaway: CLEO's bright infectious cackle cuts me off. She reaches out, to givemy hand a squeeze, I'm just bullshitting you thanks for listening as expected, the weights not long andafter a little coaxing, the hostess seats us at a table by the frontwindows, Cleo Scans, the horizon as the waitresshands us or menus it's kind of beautiful here. It really is, isn't it, but my eyes are trained on Chlio's face when she catches me staring. She rollsher eyes, but I can make out the beginnings of agrin at the corner of her mouth. The waitress looks between us andsmiles she's, a bit older with kind eyes and some grey at her temples. A large blue name, tag on her leftshoulder reads: Fran she pulls a Pencil and a pad of paper from the apronaround her waist. Can I get you to lufebirds something todrink. Cluffbirds is maybe too strog. Hoffee would be great. Thank you, Frann, nods and Jote. Something down onher note. Had CLEO shoots me a look that says interrupt me again and I'llshove breakfast sausage up your nose, I smirk and she sighs and smiles politelyup at Fram coffee would be swell Franz smiles back chops down another note andtucks her pencil behind her ear I'll, be back in a bit to take your ardor. The sounds of the diner filled thesilence between us as we pause to look over the menu, my stomach growls at the sight of thefood two tables over I'm hungry, but my stomach's, not the only thingnagging at me. What did you mean earlier when you saidI'm such a macdaniel CLEO doesn't look up from her menu. When did I say that when you forced meinto playing Taco Roulette shut up, you thought it was fun, not the point. Whatdid you mean by that she pauses and sets the menu down flatwhen she looks at me, her expression is blank unreadable. I Mat your like Bradye. Her leftshoulder shrugs slightly. I feel my feature soften a curious brow, shootingup how so she rolls her lips and mullingit over with her eyes fixed on the ceiling. I don't know you both always have toget your way. Is that a bad thing I mean? I don'tlove it when your brother throws pease on the floor. Fran returns with twosteaming mugs of coffee and sets them on the table between us know what youwant. I nawed to Cleo who smiles and points to the classic breakfast there'san excited lilt to her voice, Bacon eggs over easy and right toast,please, and for you handsome I'll, do a Denver Omelet but make thatwith EG whites only add spinach, oh and avacado. On top Fran nods, her pencilmoving furiously over the note pad and for your sight I gave Cleo apointed look Hash browns. But can I get those well done? Sha Arm Frann TUKSD the pencil behind her earand takes our menus...

...once she's out of earshot Cleo restsher dimpled elbows on the table. Her Chin in her hands beg rich kit, energyright there. I like what I like and you're, used to having what you like. Iwas raised on more of a you, get what you get kind of mentality. I don't seewhy there have to be morals attached to one or the other. There aren't untilthey effect the way you treat people mouch and there you have it folks,we've reached what we're really talking about here, like how I said, being a nanny, wasn'ta real job. She noded slowly her lips pulled into atop line like that. I pause and think about all the timeshe must have spent with my brother, my sweet infuriating, impatient, stubbornlittle asshole of a brother. If making sure he doesn't shit himselfor walk into traffic, while my mom's off managing the family business isn'ta real job, I don't know what is. I was wrong. I'm sorry, her eyes meet mine and a pit opens inmy stomach Vulnerabileby, my Achilles heal. If she doesn't say something soon, Imight jump through that window after what feels like an eternity, shespeaks. I'm sorry too, for what I said before,how you had everything handed to you. I just felt threatened and I was lashingout. I honestly don't really know anythingabout you. Fran returns with our food and we thankher as she refills our coffee mugs. Let's call it even and start over. I lift my Mug to Cleo Hi, I'm Dean macdaniel. I like you,want some matsh frowns. We eat it with feels like lightningspeed hungry from all the morning, sex and feelings. After a few beats of comfortablesilence, I prought my elbows on the table and cocked my head to the side, so is Brady still really into if you'reabout to say his tablet, then yes answers. Yes, she gives me a wry smileand shakes her head. Ah so helen caved on the tablet, afterall, so much for staying tech free until he's twelve, a familiar mixture of tension andirritation pricks at the back of my neck. Judging by the LUC on Cleo's, faceshe's noticed the change of my demeanour. I lay my hands flat on thetable. My family is complicated. At best you don't have toknow it's it's okay. I should explain. I want to explain: we both pause and she smiles softly. Itake a deep breath before continuing things with Helen will always becomplicated but Brady's the best. I was like twenty two when he was born.I don't see him much, but sometimes he feels more. Like my long lost kid thanmy little brother, are you the one who brings him SourCandy twice a year, we're working our way up to warheads? I'm thinking he'll be ready in a coupleyears, or so. We laugh and she places her hand overmine. I'm glad he has you Terry and Helen. Do their best, but he's lucky tohave you as a brother. Are you kidding you're with him every day? If it wasn'tfor you, Helen would turn out another entitled messagynistic piece of Shitthat would take years of therapy and self work to mould into a halfwaydecent human being. She gives me a slanted smile. So that'syour secret huh here is a therapy and self work. I smile back and mind blowing sex with actresses,who call me on my shit. Fran returns, leaving the check on thetable no rash. I immediately tuck it under my plate. CLEO reaches for herwallet. Oh come on at least. Let me split it with you. I cockd my head to the side. I justtold you that I can afford my own place, so I pay rent too. I own my place all right I'll catch, the next ime. We laugh and I pull out my card call me old fashioned, but I always payon the first date, not that I ever expect anything becauseof that. It just feels weird not to this wasn't a date Buckerooni. What was it then? This was an ill advised hook up with myboss's son. Do you rehash your feelings with all your hookups? She crosses her arms on the table andlooks out the window. Another grin...

...pulling at the corner of her mouthstill, not a date. Fine, it's the end of the week. What do we donow? What do you mean? I mean my conferenceis ending, and so is your shoot. Where do we go from here? What are you asking me she stares at meblankly and I stare back incredulous. Are you really going to make me say Idon't even know what we're talking about right now. No don't do that. Comeon a CLEO. I actually really like you and when all this is said and done, Iwant to see you again in the city, but your mom Brady, it's too weird andcomplicated. It won't work. You said it's a survival job, the thing that youdo so that you can do what you love, but eventually you are not going toneed it any more that or some day. Brady won't need a nanny either way.There's an end point to this situation. Oh so you're going to wait five yearsuntil Brady's in middle school and doesn't need me anymore. I reached for her hand across the tableand twining our fingers. I don't think it's going to take fiveyears for your acting career. To Take off, I mean you're in a wetflix show.It seems like it's already taking off. I can feel it and when you can feel it too give me acall. Hookup state of mind is written byBecka, Morgan and Amelia jrose produced by consensual, creating steamy feministfirst romance for riot girls; special thanks to baby money and the downpayments for the use of our theme song. Oh boy, streamable, on spotify, headsound engineer, John mcnea studio, recording by John mcneal and samesilver, moodlighting engineer, mixing by spiral like creative and masteringby eating to Vaura. This episode was performed by Nadiapelatier, DanielJordan, Evan Weisman, Herschel Bach, and me back of Morgan tune in next weekto hear Brady say you promise. I Wen e Co e Oyou, GotaPasen.

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